Today I just finished a book called
I Lost My Love In Baghdad By Michael Hastings. It is probably the most beautiful piece of literature I've read in a REALLY long time. It is powerful in nature because its a true love story of two real people. Two people whose careers dictate there futures. I can relate to this story because I am currently in a long-distance relationship with a beautiful man, whose passionate love is more than I ever dreamed of; as well as our careers, both military in nature are dictate by the events of the world around us. We're both scared right now. I'm scared that he doesn't think our love will be enough - I think it will. A little love is always enough. I would give him my world if he asked it of me. I don't think he quite realizes that just yet. I think its because he's be an absolute miracle for me. Saving me from my self-destructive ways.
"When was the moment you knew???"The moment I knew that I loved him was the day after we had gone out and been drinking. I had been a complete jackass about a situation that had happened the night before and I stormed out of the bar and went home. I shouldn't have gone home because I was so drunk that it was probably VERY unsafe for me to be alone. I remember the next day being in his room and apologizing to him about what had happened. I realized that he was genuinely concerned about my well-being and that I had deeply hurt him just vanishing like that. He was worried that something bad had happened to me and that it might have hurt our relationship. I Knew in that moment of him expressing his concern for me, his genuine worry over myself, I knew that I loved him. And that I was scared of loving anyone who could ever love me.
I remember the first night we kissed. I told him up front that I was an emotional trainwreck and that he'd probably just wanna go be with someone else. Thats when he told me that he liked me the first moment he saw me. Of course, I thought he was meaning a few days before our little date. No - he ment the moment he saw me five months prior to that night, when I first got here. He saw me sweeping the steps in my office. Then he saw me around post. Then we talked once at the clinic. Then the night at the bar. Then the first time we talked and went out on a date.
I love him - I love him deeply. I love him because he loves me and all my imperfections and perfections. I don't know where I would be without him. I always want him in my life - through thick and thin.
